Dear Neil,
It says 10:53 on the laptop now. It has been EXACTLY 3 years since you were born. I didn't plan to start a letter at 10:53. I wish I were able to plan things that well, it just happened.
I look at you today and I am not sure what happened. I got you home from the hospital, blinked and now here you are 3 years old. I remember crying when I held you for the first time. And then you looked at me. I might forget many daily things like where my keys are and call your sister by your name or fail to wish people Happy Birthday, but I can never forget that. I was thinking so much of you today all day.
You got many gifts today, a trike, flash cards, clothes, tag reader books, play food. But I think the thing that made you the happiest was some undivided attention from me. You had a bubble bath which you loved, lots of reading, ipad time, great food, payasam, and fun at your little party. It was just your Dad, me Ammachy, and Niya, but it was nice.
You are such a loving little boy. You are completely missing that thing called jealousy. Even with a lot of my time going towards your little sister, you have not shown a spark of resentment. You love her to bits (literally) and get up every morning and ask for her the first thing. Cuddles are so few these days, but bedtime is the best. I put you in the crib and you make your lovie into a pillow and say "Mama go to sleep" (which means mama, sleep with me) and when I get up and go after some time, you say "Stay" That is when I get to shower you with kisses.
You love reading, playing in the water, piano, music and your current love, the ipad. You love doing laundry, and thanks to you, I am on top of laundry now. You are very persistent and I love that. On the same note, you are quite stubborn. We are trying to help you best to do things without crushing your feisty personality. You have a fantastic memory and a sense of humor which is coming out now. It is hilarious to hear you come up with things. You are 100% boy, you love "toot" jokes. I think at this point you love your Ammachy best. Maybe it is because you get your own way with her the most. You love being with her and I think you are going to miss her once she goes back to India in 2 months. You love your preschool and is now happy to go there. We took some cupcakes there to share with your friends.
You bring so much joy into our lives. Although it has only been 3 years, it is hard to imagine a time when you were not there. (What did I do all day?) I am realizing that the time before I got pregnant with you is starting to become hazy. Sometimes when I look at you, my heart gets so full that my eyes fill up. And your heavenly Father loves you even more than that. Imagine! Neil, I hope you always remember that you can do nothing to make us love you any more or any less. We know you are struggling with some things. We are trying to help you the best we can. Sometimes, it just hurts to watch you struggle and I want to come in and take it all away. But I know I can't. I can hold your hand so far and then let go and let you work it out and have my prayers follow you. Just as it will the rest of my life.
Love,
Mama
It says 10:53 on the laptop now. It has been EXACTLY 3 years since you were born. I didn't plan to start a letter at 10:53. I wish I were able to plan things that well, it just happened.
I look at you today and I am not sure what happened. I got you home from the hospital, blinked and now here you are 3 years old. I remember crying when I held you for the first time. And then you looked at me. I might forget many daily things like where my keys are and call your sister by your name or fail to wish people Happy Birthday, but I can never forget that. I was thinking so much of you today all day.
You got many gifts today, a trike, flash cards, clothes, tag reader books, play food. But I think the thing that made you the happiest was some undivided attention from me. You had a bubble bath which you loved, lots of reading, ipad time, great food, payasam, and fun at your little party. It was just your Dad, me Ammachy, and Niya, but it was nice.
You are such a loving little boy. You are completely missing that thing called jealousy. Even with a lot of my time going towards your little sister, you have not shown a spark of resentment. You love her to bits (literally) and get up every morning and ask for her the first thing. Cuddles are so few these days, but bedtime is the best. I put you in the crib and you make your lovie into a pillow and say "Mama go to sleep" (which means mama, sleep with me) and when I get up and go after some time, you say "Stay" That is when I get to shower you with kisses.
You love reading, playing in the water, piano, music and your current love, the ipad. You love doing laundry, and thanks to you, I am on top of laundry now. You are very persistent and I love that. On the same note, you are quite stubborn. We are trying to help you best to do things without crushing your feisty personality. You have a fantastic memory and a sense of humor which is coming out now. It is hilarious to hear you come up with things. You are 100% boy, you love "toot" jokes. I think at this point you love your Ammachy best. Maybe it is because you get your own way with her the most. You love being with her and I think you are going to miss her once she goes back to India in 2 months. You love your preschool and is now happy to go there. We took some cupcakes there to share with your friends.
You bring so much joy into our lives. Although it has only been 3 years, it is hard to imagine a time when you were not there. (What did I do all day?) I am realizing that the time before I got pregnant with you is starting to become hazy. Sometimes when I look at you, my heart gets so full that my eyes fill up. And your heavenly Father loves you even more than that. Imagine! Neil, I hope you always remember that you can do nothing to make us love you any more or any less. We know you are struggling with some things. We are trying to help you the best we can. Sometimes, it just hurts to watch you struggle and I want to come in and take it all away. But I know I can't. I can hold your hand so far and then let go and let you work it out and have my prayers follow you. Just as it will the rest of my life.
Love,
Mama
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