Reflections

I am turning another year older tomorrow. When I was 18, the 30s seemed so old. When I was 21, I felt very old and mature. I don't feel very old now. Which probably means I am growing older gracefully. :) A lady at church yesterday said I look young and pretty. Well, beauty beholder etc etc. I do have a couple of grey hair, my metabolism is not what it used to be, I am a few pounds heavier, few shades darker. And those are just the physical changes. 25-30 years (and continuing) has been the most eventful in my life.

When I was newly married, my husband and I vied with each other to create the perfect birthday for each other. After our wedding, the first birthday was R's. We were in two places at that time, but I bought him an ipod, took him to a mystery dinner, bought clothes, made a collage birthday card, booked him a massage, made his favourite stuff, and totally made a weekend out of it. Not to be outdone, on my birthday, he showed up at my work with flowers, arranged a lunch with my boss and some friends, went to La Nouba, had dinner out, bought me dresses, stuffed toys and made me a card with all the 52+ pet names he called me in the time he knew me.

After that, all of our birthdays, we took 3 days off and travelled. We went to Yellowstone, Utah for R's 2007, Grand Canyon for my 2007, Yosemite for R's 2008 and Bahamas cruise for my 2008. That was our last vacation with just the two of us. We were planning one to Costa Rica for our anniversary in 2008, but it never worked out and we are happy it didn't as I was pregnant with neil by then. Then in May 2009, we went to Hawaii but I was 6 months pregnant with Neil and although it was just the two of us, it still wasn't just the two of us :) I made a nice lunch for R for his 2009 birthday and that was it. I was a new mom for my 29th birthday and my parents were here with me, and I had pretty much everything I wanted.

The year I had Neil was when it changed for me. Now, we exchange cards and buy something we need. This year I needed a coat, and R got that for me. I am celebrating my birthday tomorrow with a doctors appointment. :) Life is very busy for us now. Years back, it was all about me and us. And here is the funny part, I don't miss it at all. And here is something else I never thought I would say: I don't miss the traveling. Honestly, it is more like a hassle packing everything for all of us for a few days of travel. I like staying home and the routine. I know a time will come in our lives when Neil gets much older, we will have time for everything we have put in the burner. I am enjoying this season in life. And a birthday marks another year that has gone past. I have changed, I know, and I hope - for the better.

My sweet husband and child is fast asleep hugging each other up in our bed. I should be asleep too. But I am enjoying this few hours of alone time. R might not get up to wish me Happy Birthday at the stroke of midnight. But he took Neil out in the evening, so I could have a few hours to myself. Then he took him up to bed and I had more time. That is worth more than any pearl necklaces and diamond earrings to me now. I am truly blessed!

Choices

Today I finally closed one chapter in my life. I was not actively working for the company I used to work for, but I was still on the roster and had not cut the ties completely. Not because I wanted to hang on to the job, but for various other reasons I just don't want to get in to in this post. I went there with Neil, got my pension papers. Instead of 401k matching, my company used to put a specified amount each year for all the employees. And now that I "retired", I was able to vest it. It is truly the Lord's provision (We had completely forgotten about it). R and I were talking about saving up for our tax return. This year we will end up paying a lot of money on our return and since we are a one income family now, saving is not quite that quick. Praise God for meeting our needs.

I joined work on January 2, 2006 and my last day of full time work was August 20, 2009, just before I left for maternity leave. After that I worked part time, from home, on call until July when I left for India. When I came back, I submitted my resignation, but nothing was acted up on until today. I walked out of the office for the last time today. There was a lot of drama since I re-joined work after maternity leave in 2009. God worked out the details such that I walked out with my head held high, a satisfaction of work well done and fulfilling Colossians 3:23

²³ And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, (Colossians 3:23, New King James Version)

Since we went to town, we made a half day out of it, by going to Babies R us, Costco and the insurance office to pay our van insurance. And being out half day, there was no time to prepare lunch, so Neil and I shared a n*ked (just want to stop the spam) burrito from Qdoba and got a subway for R. Neil fell asleep on the way back and I was just in a contemplative mood. Recently, I saw an email from a friend (who is in a very high position in a company) who has two kids. Being in a high and responsible position, she just gets home to have enough time to barely see her children before bath time and bed. Both husband and wife have great careers, so they have the best childcare etc. But she says she regrets not being able to see her kids grow and being unable to spend much time with them. Choosing to stay home with the kids or continuing with a career are intensely personal choices (If you are lucky enough to be able to actually make a choice and it is not focred upon you by things beyond your control). On the half hour drive back, I had an epiphany. When we make these kind of choices though, we are not really making a present day choice.

We are choosing regrets.

We are choosing 20 years from now what we will regret more. Not spending enough time with our children or not having had a career/paycheck. I know a lot of us don't have the luxury of choice. Circumstances force some who want to be with the kids to be at the workplace. And you will never find one word of condemnation or condescension for outside working mamas here. And I know that if our circumstance change, I will find work and work cheerfully in a heartbeat. But now, I have the blessed privilege of choice and when I thought about what would be my regrets, it was very clear to me that I have made the right choice.

Happy New Year

I already did my reflections on 2010 post a week before. What about the resolutions one? I want to look back on my 2010 resolutions post for a minute here. It should be highly entertaining. Like laugh at me funny.

Here it is

1. Bible Reading: I started out well, and happy to say ending well. In the middle of the year with 3 months of travel from May to October, it didn't really go well at all.

2.Floss: Probably did that twice in 2010. The aim was 4 times a week. That is what is called a stellar failure

3. Prenatal Vitamins: Actually, this takes the cake. I never even bought it from the store. Forget about eating it.

4. Blog 100 posts: Actually, including this it will be 57, so it was not too bad. Not the goal, but at least not an epic failure. And as a side note, can I say I am so so glad that I blogged monthly Neil updates. I already find myself forgetting the details and it is so neat for me to go back and read it.

5. Water Intake: I think for about 50% of the time, I managed around a bottle a day.

6. I have to laugh as I re-read the original post. I had forgotten about 6 and 7 and jumped from point 5 to 8. Maybe one of the resolutions this year should be to learn from 1 to 10?

8. Breakfast: Also, a very good failure. Maybe 20 times this year, if I am generous. Nowhere near everyday.

9. Stretching. Nope, must have done it 3 times or 5 tops.

10. Walk: Picked up towards the end, but what with the injuries and all that, Memaw has been taking it easy, kids.

11. Ladies Bible Study: Didn't go even once. I can't call it a failure as it was a conscious decision I had to take as Neil grew older. We have a very small chapel, and if I go for it, either myself or some lady has to take him out so we can do the study. There really is no childcare as such, and I didn't want to burden anyone. And they started doing combined studies which honestly I don't enjoy as much.

12. Read to baby: Finally, a success to report. Maybe because it was technically not a NYR, but something I was already doing? I read to him almost everyday and multiple times most days.

So, with the overall stellar failure of 2010 resolutions, I really shouldn't even think of any for 2011, right? But I did. I do have goals for 2011. Maybe if I call them goals instead of resolutions, I might do better.

I already have ours listed on the calendar. One of the main ones is I have to prepare for an exam which I am planning to take some time in April/May. And we have to put in a lot of effort combined towards our business. Pretty much that are the goals for 2011. And then there are some sundry little personal stuff that I need to work on. But I guess I don't need to humiliate myself (like I just did) by putting those here.

I leave with you two pictures. One at the beginning of the year and one towards the end. Nothing reminds me how fast time flies as this:

January 2010



December 2010




Wish all of you a wonderful 2011.

And that is all I am going to say about that

To update on the story below, I have no (or ever had any) intention to take her to small claims court. The $25 is not worth the hassle or emotions for me or my baby. I was not relentlessly stalking her with a pitchfork, nor was I thinking about it every minute of the day. If I were, I would have sent a lot more emails and phone calls. It would come up every so often, and I would send a friendly reminder. I don't have the time or energy to rip apart her reply, but I can assure you, it is complete BS and "borderline lying."

She might be the nicest person in the world and she could have had a bad day and sent that email. Or she might be a jerk like many other people in the world. Thanks for all your comments, it was cathartic for me to write it out.

K, I want to address your comment though mainly because of the line about "taking emotions out and putting yourself in her shoes." I don't think emotions were really involved. You can see from my emails that it was pretty noncommittal. I did not tell her "I drove one hour to get the china cabinet and it is terrible what you are doing to me and I am 7 months pregnant and blah blah." She offered me to pay the money back if it didn't work out. My taking the piece was contingent upon getting transportation. When you make a verbal promise to refund the money, it IS her problem. And as for putting myself in her shoes, I would never behave this way. I mean what I say and say what I mean. If I am having a bad day or PMS or hormones and behaved badly, I darn well will make amends and apologize.

I want to end with another CL story. We had a green sofa in our office room which we didn't have room for anymore. I had advertised it as no rips or stains as I didn't find any when I was looking at it. I was trying to sell it for a while and a lady came and looked at it. She took a cursory look at it and said she was interested. We had offered delivery and when we were loading it in the van, I saw that it had a rip on it which I had never noticed. It was not huge and could be patched up. When we got there, we told her about it, and she was very upset. We reduced the price by $40, and she was a little appeased. I felt bad the entire day that I had not looked at the sofa well enough before posting it. Two days later, I wrote her a letter of apology saying what had happened was unintentional on my part, but asking for forgiveness. I also included $20 on it. She emailed me back with a sweet response and said it was not even a big deal, she could patch it up and she was very touched by the email.

I did not write the above to show what a great person I am though it may seem like it. *smiles* I just mean to say that even with the best of intentions, we can make mistakes. That is okay. The character shows in how you choose to correct it.

In dear Miss Shannon's case, other than *maybe* sending an occasional one line email, I am not doing anything. Unlike her fake busy-ness and stamp-less business ownerships, I really am busy with life - incredibly so. The blogging about it was great, because it got the nasty email out of my system without having to deal with her. She hasn't found the time to take 60 seconds to paypal the money yet, but I am going to let this go and her petty self can do the right thing if/when she chooses to.

And as someone eloquently said, "And that is all I am going to say about that."

A Craigslist Story

This is going to be rather long, so bear with me.

I have been looking for a china cabinet in craigslist for a long time. We don't have a very formal dining room and so I never felt the need for buying brand new for $1000 or more. The search has been on since end of April, but nothing has worked out.

In the meantime, we went to several houses, trying to get something that was reasonably well maintained and matched our existing dark brown furniture in the dining room. Finally, I found something that seemed to match (from the picture) and I emailed the person for more pictures. She sent it within 4 hours and I made an appointment to see it that evening. It was almost an hour drive from work, but I decided to go anyway. I got there and saw that the piece was reasonably good, although smaller than a regular cabinet. The color was not an exact match and there were scuff marks, but I had enough with all the searching and said I liked it. Shannon, who was the lady whom I was dealing with, said that some other people inquired about it and would I mind leaving a security deposit to hold it. I told her then that transportation was a problem, and I need to figure out how to get the piece home. She agreed that if it did not work out, she will refund the money back. I called R and asked him, and he said to go ahead pay them the money if I liked it. So I paid $25 as a good faith money and left the place. This was on June 8 around 7pm.

I came home, and the transportation thing became an issue. Friend's van didn't work out and U-Haul turned out to be too expensive and almost cost as much as the cabinet price. I emailed Shannon back on June 9 and told her about the situation. She emailed back immediately and said she understood and her husband would look around and see if he could help with the delivery and that she would put it back on the market. This was less than 24 hours before I left their house.

Three days later, I got an email saying she was able to sell it and she asked for my address so that she could send me the deposit back. I sent her back my address and waited. After all the back and forth, there was no response from her to my last email about when she would send it. I dismissed the thought and the days went by. 8 days later on the 20th, I sent her the following email.

Hi Shannon,

I had emailed you our home address last Saturday. I was wondering if you had a chance to mail me back the $25 I had given as a deposit for the china cabinet. Please do let me know.

In case you did not receive the last email, the address is

I received no response. 4 days later, I called her husband's phone number, which was the one I had and basically said the same thing in the email. He said he would ask her that night. No response. 3 days after that, on the 27th I again called and left a message. Again, nothing. Finally, on June 29th, I sent an email with a cc to her work email which she had given me.

Hi Shannon,

I have emailed you twice, and spoke to Bill twice as well. You still have not send me the $25 good faith money that I gave you to hold the china cabinet. On June 12th you emailed me that you already sold it. It has been 17 days since then. Is there a problem? It is bad that I have to keep emailing and calling.

And I got the following (part) in reply yesterday. Spelling and grammar mistakes verbatim from her email.

I mean you no disrespect as I am sure my words are going to be taken out of context; however, I must respond in this manner. When you left my home on June 4th, it was with the plan that you would be back that weekend to take possesion of the china cabinet I had listed on craigslist. At that time you left me a deposit for the china cabinet so that I would cancel the three addtional appointments I had scheduled for that evening. Thus cancelling any potential to sell the china cabinet. You then emailed me to let me know that you would be unable to pick up the china cabinet as agreed because of the travel requirements. I then relisted the cabinet on cragslist and was able a week later to sell the cabinet as described in my email on the 13th. It was in fact my intention to return your deposit as I asked for your address to do so. However the incesent phone calls and emails are bordering on harrassmnet. If you had left a deposit with any business and then backed out of the deal at your request, you would forfeit that deposit. With any business transaction that requires a refund it can take 4-6weeks for that to happen. I say this not to insue anger but yet to remind you to calm down. As I'm sure your life is busy; so is mine. Unfortunately with 2 businesses to run and a family to maintain you are not at the top of my priority list. It has skipped my mind on numerous occasions to send you a refund. In fact the envelope is on my desk waiting to be taken to the post office for postage. I have not however been able to fit into my day a trip to the post office when I begin seeing patients at 8am and stop seeing patients at 6pm. By the time I am anywhere near a post office, they are closed. At any time you would like, you are more than welcome to stop by for the refund. If I am unavaiable I can leave the envelope taped to the front door or if my childrens nanny is home she can give you the envelope. Otherwise I'm sorry but you are going to have to wait for my schedule to open up. If you have a paypal account you could send me an invoice for the $25 and I will be happy to refund the money in that manner as well

So I sent her a one line email asking her to put the money in my hubby's paypal account.

These are my questions, interpeeps.

1. Are 2 (polite) phone calls and 2 emails in 18 days reminding to send refund money borderline harassment?

2. What would you have done?

a. Forgive her. Vengeance belongs to the Lord
b. Don't bother, it is only $25 afterall. And anyway, you deserve it for being stupid
c. Pursue it. It is not just the money, it is the principle of the thing. Send polite emails and reminders
d. Take her to small claims court and send threatening emails in the meantime.

3. What should I have done different? Should I have waited longer before sending a reminder.

and now, MORAL OF THE STORY

Thou shalt not be stupid like me.

And this is how I feel like now.

Fried Brain

I am on my way to Tampa today evening for a work related thingie. This time I am going by myself and I am hoping I will be back in one piece on Wednesday. My brain has never been so fried as it has been in the past week.

Just in the last week,

1. I almost sent an email to a dear friend starting Dear Annie,
2. Almost deleted a long email from a friend becasue I didn't "recognize" the email address. She has had that email for the longest time.
3. Kept water for tea and completely forgot about it.
4. And to add insult upon injury, and after all my excellent trip organizing advice, I forgot to put in any night clothes for my trip today. I have to stop at Target to buy some jammies for the two nights. I am sincerely hoping I won't be looking for my car in the parking lot after that.

I think all the insomnia is catching up finally.

Highlights from my week and thoughts running through my head

1. Wrapped gifts under the tree
2. Half clean house
3. Sick hubby who needs a lot of TLC
3. Eating leftovers for myself and soup for hubby to make time for cleaning
4. Hoping I haven't gotten sick as well
5. Wondering where all our guests are going to sleep
6. Keeping DH away from work and trying to get him to rest
7. Thrilled and looking forward to spending time with family.
8. Hope they would like my cooking after being used to my sisters awesome food.
9. Praying that I won't sing off-key during the cantata
10. Wondering why I could not come up with a shorter title for this post

Mish Mash

My sister and family are visiting us this Christmas and staying with us for 8 days. To say I am excited is putting it very mildly. I have not seen them in three years and I am literally counting the days. To plan their fun week here was glory to my organizing soul and Excel and I had a grand ole' time. I talked to sis today and told her about a tentative schedule I had prepared. Then I also mentioned that I made a menu plan. She listened to me very kindly, but was probably thinking I was slightly off my rocker.

Organizing is great and it is one of my strengths and weakness as well. After all the planning and organizing, if things go awry, I start twitching. That is where I am really glad I have the DH next to me. Otherwise I will have to take to clenched fists, and gritted teeth repeating to myself "I am calm, I am calm." That would not be very convincing or helpful I think.

I have been on a reading binge for the last 2 weeks and now I am feeling a little burnt out. I read The Poisonwood Bible, Same kind of different as me, Two Income Trap in about 10 days. This was with a full time job, guests, and cooking. Which means I was reading every spare second I had. Like reading while stirring the soup. Right now I am reading Animal, Vegetable, Miracle. I will review Two Income Trap soon. I do have something to say about the book.

Our house is all done with respect to new countertops, flooring, carpet etc. I have to paint the bathroom and I will be done. I am excited. I will try to put pictures after I take them, sometime in this millennium.

I also have the tree up and the decorations out. I still have not finished buying all the gifts. And our travel plans have been cancelled. I am actually kind of relieved. With all that has been going on, planning for that has been a wee bit too much.

This has been a pretty hodgey podgey post and I apologize.

Thanksgiving notes

So, thanksgiving weekend went well. We had the guests with the food restrictions, but it went remarkably well. I managed to cook stuff that could accommodate everybody, so no one had to starve. We had thankgiving dinner at a friends place. It was lovely. And here is a photo I stole from her blog.

We did an eat and run as we had to get the house and food ready for our guests. I have no idea how the four days went, but it just did in a flash. Our Oaklahoman guests left very early Monday morning and in the night we had some other guests from Milwaukee.

Unfortunately since it was a Monday and both hubby and I work, we were not able to provide as good a dinner as we wanted to. On top of that hubs had a dentist appointment and since we are a one car family, the logistics did not work out the way to facilitate an elaborate meal . There was just pulav, raita, and fish fry. They ate well, but I feel it was inadequate. Hubby told me to get over it and that majority of the people would have just eaten out if they worked full time and had guests on a weekday. They brought us wine, and two kinds of chocolate all wrapped up in nice bows. I am not sure who is going to eat all that chocolate. It will take us three months to finish that. Since we don't drink, we had the guests drink the wine themselves. I realized that a bottle is not much at all since they managed to finish it between them.

I have not been able to put up any Christmas decorations and now I am in the process of making a to do list for all the things to be done before the end of the year. There is Christmas, family visiting for a week, our wedding anniversary, a tentative travel plan, hubbys Microsoft certification exam, and some birthdays coming up. I think the organizing/scheduling part of my brain just went into overdrive.

It is a good thing that I love the busyness of everyday life. Recently I had a friend tell me (nicely) that if she tried to do all that I do, she would go crazy. Aren't you glad that God made us all gloriously different with unique capabilities and talents? I know I am.

My life on paper

One of the questions I get since I have a career is "How do you manage everything?" or "I could never do what you are doing!". From some, it is genuine appreciation, for others it is "I bet you eat out every day and your house is a pig sty." I usually answer Time Management, but I guess it kind of implies that I am a super woman who does all things in order and perfection. ahem. Also my "managing everything" is work, eat, sleep (some days), but for the other person it very well could be work, cook 4 course meals, keep a spotless home, do crafts, volunteer, knit, sew, garden, teach etc.

So this is reality.

Things I don't do

1. Bake. Very rarely - once in 2 months or so a banana bread is the extend of my baking. DH and I are not big fans of baked goods.
2. Sew. No time/talent
3. Crafts. See (2)
4. Home improvement stuff - painting, ongoing decoration etc. No time or eye for decoration.
5. Window shopping. No time.
6. Garage sale-ing, thrifting - no money saved that way. Again, no time
7. Hair/makeup. Getting ready takes me 3 miuntes down to the shoes. No interest in spending hours before a mirror.
8. Vacuum/mop/clean everyday. This is more a dislike induced procrastination than time issue if I am honest with myself.
9. Blog every day. Unable to make time
10. Work out every day. Unable to make time
11. Watch a lot of TV shows/movies. Again a conscious choice due to its energy sapping capability than a time issue. Unfortunately not working very well since I replace the TV with internet. Back to square one.
12. Go for the mid week Bible study. Time and some other issues.

Things I do

1. Work full time
2. Help DH's business with sales and payroll
3. Cook every day (mostly) and keep a clean sink
4. Teach sunday school
5. Read/Study Bible and other books an hour every day.
6. Coupon (yes, it is a verb!)

As you can see there are a lot of things I am not able to do. Granted all those are not things I necessarily *want* to do except the midweek Bible study. I miss not being able to do that regularly.

Oh, and to add, I do not consider paying bills, getting dressed and doing laundry as huge tasks to put in the list since it takes less than 5 minutes each. Rest assured that both of us have clean clothes and that our bills are paid.

This is not a strict list of things I do/don't do. Pretty much this is how it works out in the end for me in real life. I have tried to do more before, but it has been crash and burn for the most part. There are some things that are important to me. Like home cooked meals. I make time for that. Like everyone else, I make choices.

I don't do it all. Nor do I know anyone in the world who does it all. I don't even think he/she exists. In fact I don't even think there is an "all" in the commonly attributed sense of the word. An all to me could be none to you and some to you could mean none to me. You get my drift, don't you? On a given day if you have given your best to what you do and do it as unto the Lord, you have done it all. And that is my definition of a person who does it all.

As if I don't talk enough about myself

Amy tagged me for this. Some of it you may already know. Just pretend you are reading it for the first time.

1. I do not like the taste of cheese, coffee and wine and can only tolerate two kinds of chocolate- Ferrero Rocher and Kitkat (Please be my friend still!)

2. My husband says that I would have the above three if it is fried. I love me some fried stuff. My face is proof of that.

3. I love having people over, but I am worried about what to cook since my guests are mostly American and I am not. They complain about the spiciness. I seem unable to adjust it.

4. I sometimes look at my husband and house and wonder if it is all a dream. I could never picture myself married and taking care of a house. (Although I am using the term "taking care" very loosely here). But wonder of wonders, I am incredibly content.

5. There are only few things in life that I hate and one of them is MLM (Multi-Level Marketing). I think it spoils friendships.

6. I am pretty anal-ytical about purchases. I compare shop online, actual shops, sleep on it, sleep on it some more, read reviews, make excel sheets. It is the engineer in me or maybe I am just cheap. I am sure its just the cheapness, but it sounds better to say engineer.

7. At last count (he keeps adding to it), my husband has 62 pet names for me. I have 3 for him. Guess who is the creative one in the marriage?

Now to tag. I am tagging the following people.

Saagar (My first friend after I landed here in the US of A. If there is anything I don't know about you, I want to know it now.)
Calamity Jean (My very first blog friend although I wouldn't know her if I met her on the street)
Ruth (A new blogger, she is English and it would be nice to know more)
Allison (A new blogger, I know she gardens, it will be fun to read more)
Quirky (A new read for me, she is funny and I like funny)
HopiQ (My real-life friend, my first faithful reader, and the mother of my "son". As an aside, anything to get her to post.)
Beth (A relatively new read, and a very talented lady to boot. Check out her project of the last supper)

If you have a policy decision against doing memes, please don't feel obliged to do it.

Clothes Policy

I have a 6-month rule for the closet. Any article of clothing, which I don't wear for 6 months, I assume that I will not be wearing again and it goes into the Goodwill bag. And I have been pretty ruthless so far. It helps me keep the closet clutter free, retains my sanity and works out great for me. Or should I say...worked out.

Some of the clothes that I don't wear anymore are slighltly oversize T-shirts and baggy tops. A while ago, I had purged my closet from all those and donated two bags to Goodwill. And then 3 weeks before I had to go for fieldwork for 2 weeks for my job. And the kind of work I was supposed to do there, called for the baggiest tops and T-shirts. And loose pants. Speaking of pants, since my reacent body padding, those don't fit anymore. Not that I had any fit for soil sampling. There was one, and no prizes for guessing where it went. So, I ended up having to buy baggy pants. I managed to survive with a bunch of company and conference T shirts though.

Anyway, I was decluttering my closet again yesterday. While I used to ruthlessly throw clothes into piles, I paused as I was fingering the clothes yesterday. I wondered if my mom's way made sense. She keeps everything. Even stuff she no longer wears and stuff for which I cannot think of an earthly use, she will keep. She has outfits that are 33 years old. Saris that are literally falling to pieces.

Now I am wondering if maybe it is a good idea to keep some of my less worn outfits for times like this.

What is your clothes buying and decluttering policy? That is in case you do have a policy.

The story of a toothache

When I decided to start a blog, I was determined not to write stuff like I had cereal for breakfast, I plan to have chicken for lunch, I puked once today, roses are so pretty. In the course of 1.5 years, I think I did all that. Not only that, I have on my reader people who write that and I actually enjoy it. (Admittedly, not the throwing-up part.)

I must be getting older or something.

Anyway, all this to tell you about the toothache I had past Friday. Writing about that will leave no ground uncovered for the topics I discuss on this blog.

I had a wisdom tooth extracted about a month back, and I was hurting. That was normal, there was a lot of bleeding. I was whining and complaining, but I was still working through that. Then three weeks later, I had a temporary crown put in. It wasn't too bad, there were some slight complications, so it hurt a bit. But a girl's gotta do what she's gotta do.

Fast forward to Friday night. The tooth started hurting and I had 2 painkillers. Then I slept. I woke up bright and early Saturday morning with the pain. Such pain as I never had up till this point in my life. I could not sit, stand, walk, talk. I was rolling on the floor crying in pain. That was a new experience for me. I called my parents in India and I think I scared the living daylights out of them. (Sorry Papa and Mama!).

I called the dentist and left a message. I took two more painkillers and couple of hours later, my pain subsided. My dentist office called back and said they will call the pharmacy and prescribe antibiotics for me.

The pain never came back. It was the weirdest experience for me. The dental office said they never heard pain coming one week after the crown is placed. If there was an infection, I don't know why it never hurt again. At this point I don't have answers to that. What I do know is that prayers are answered. And I serve a God who cares for me.

And that is enough knowledge.

Because I am too lazy to do a real post

I had a lot of ideas for posts in the past few days, but I never got around to writing any of it. It is just that things get so busy and it is hard to find time for blog upkeep. Anyway, this was not one of my original post ideas, but Thursdays Child tagged me for this and I decided to do it today.

What was I doing 10 years ago?

I was preparing for an entrance exam that would get me into engineering school. I eventually cleared it and made it there. There as in the particular school I wanted to be. Or the one my parents wanted me to be. I honestly didn't care that much. I Just barely made it though. That is one tough exam and the competition is enough to kill you or if you manage to survive - give you nightmares for the rest of your earthly pilgrimage. Yes, I still get nightmares about that exam.

5 Things on my to-do list:

I will cheat a little and put one on the list that I already did. I just want to feel a little good about myself. I am known to actually put stuff I already did on my to do list so I can cross it off.

• Draft a work email which actually should have been sent Friday (done, YAAY)
• Deweed the vegetable garden
• Prepare for Sunday school lesson for tomorrow
• Clear out closet and donate items
• Put recycling out

Snacks I enjoy

Tuna Cutlet, Dahi Vada, Gobi Manjurian, Beef Samosa, Chicken Puffs

What would I do if I were a billionaire?

That one is easy. We would pack up, go to India, start a school for underprivileged kids and I would also rent a summer cottage at PEI and go there every year.

Places I have lived

• India (same place first 23 years of my life)
• Ohio
• Oregon (on and off)
• Florida

Jobs I've Had

• Cashier at an AVI restaurant
• Teaching Assistant
• Math Tutor
• Environmental Engineer
• Assistant Project Manager

5 people I'm tagging

Kyla

Amy

Anne Marie

Hope

USA

The Change

The job I currently am in is pretty low stress. Granted, there are a few days here and there when deadlines have to be met, and there isn't enough data or time to make it happen. There were a lot of new challenges for me getting involved in different things. And I loved it. Challenging, yet low stress, wearing jeans to work, no need for makeup, work through lunch so I can get out earlier. I had it good.

Now another company has requested my services as a consultant to work in their offices 3 days a week. I am going to be a Project Manager there. The person who requested me is the director of that company. I went there on Wednesday for an orientation type thing. The atmosphere is nothing like what I am used to. It is a formal work environment and my position is very different too. Tentatively I am going to be working Monday through Wednesday there and Thursday and Friday at my regular office. I am starting work coming Monday.

So these are the changes I anticipate in no particluar order:
1. Wearing business casuals and makeup
2. Ironing clothes
3. Better hair care
4. Getting up earlier in the morning
5. More drive time
6. Longer work hours
7. Way more responsibility
8. More work related travel
9. Lot more meetings

As you can see, there are going to be some changes in my life which are definitely going to follow this. Longer driving time and getting up early etc. are going to eat into my personal time. My new job from all appearances is going to be pretty taxing. And I have a home to take care of. Contrary to what you might read in uber-patriarchal blogs, we do not subsist on McDonalds. Although in the interest of full disclosure, I have to say that some days I feel like looking at my house and saying: "Pig sty, thy name is my house". To which my husband declares: "Then they are pretty clean pigs". He has lower expectations, what can I say? But like they (the patris) are so fond of saying, we cannot do it all. And I agree, something has to give.

And in my case, it is going to be the blog.

As it is, I hardly have the time to blog. But I always had time to read. Now, three days of the week that is also most probably not going to happen. They have filters and all such fun stuff at the new place. I will try and catch up with blogs of my friends over the weekend or evenings while I watch TV (thats rare though), but I would probably not want to spend precious time writing out posts.

This gig as of now is going to last 3 months. So unless things are not as busy as I expect or I am doing an exceptional job of time management, it is temporary goodbye time. I will still be around posting comments as and when I can. Maybe even post. Then why this post? Mainly as an insurance. I don't want to start every post by saying, "I am so sorry, I haven't posted in a while." And also, I don't want you to feel I am ignoring you if I don't comment as often. You will all continue to be in my prayers. I would appreciate if you can remember me once in a while in your prayers as well.

This and That

I was not feeling good at all this weekend. Nothing spectacular, just aches and pains all over. So when you are all achy and painy what is the best thing to do?

Give the kitchen a complete overhaul of course!

So that is what I found myself doing on Saturday and some of Sunday. Took out all the pantry items, rearranged everything. Initially, I was planning to work on only the pantry closet, but ended up pretty much rearranging the whole kitchen.

I also ended up with a nice leg ache for the night, but those trifle things do not bother me when I am on an OCD roll. I don't have any pictures to show, but it looked really good if I may say so myself.

Then we went mega grocery shopping on Saturday and here (Picture will be updated shortly) is what we got for $13.15. This was the single greatest couponing accomplishment EVER. (It is a long story) So inspite of the health issues, it was a pretty productive weekend.

I am going to share about a possible change in the next few days. It is not something that I expected and I don't know how everything is going to work out long-term, but for now it is definitely going to be a change. I am excited and nervous at the same time.

And that is all the notes from the weekend.

Weekly Plan

I made a time table for the week. If I have done it once, I have done it a hundred times. It never fails to fail. I am all gung-ho Sunday night, but come Monday morning, I don't want to get up from bed. And then I manage to drag myself out and go to work and then by afternoon, my energy level increases. By evening, I am raring to go. And this is for a typical day at work, not the super crazy ones.

Can you say I am a night person? All those late nights at college will have a long term effect on your system. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Yesterday I made yet another time table for the week. I also made a menu plan and (made darling hubby) cut the necessary veggies for the week. This morning the alarm rang, I didn't get up on time and failed the plan already. I got a little late, but I was determined to not let it deter me from the rest. By some miraculous feat, I left home when I was supposed to. And I am hopeful about the rest of the week.

Looks like I am also incorrigibly optimistic as well.

I am going to do what I have never done before here. Share my weekly plan and menu. In the hopes that it will encourage me to stay on course.

Menu for this week
Sunday: Moong dal, Spinach, Cabbage
Monday: Nan, Gobi Manchurian (It is a cauliflower dish)
Tuesday: Aviyal, Beans
Wednesday: Homemade veggie noodles
Thursday: Padavalnga, Paalak Dal, Carrot halwa (dessert)
Friday: Paalappam, Vegetable Stew

It is okay if you did not understand half of what the dishes in my menu are. All are vegetarian dishes. Husband is a vegetarian and I very rarely cook non-vegetarian.

And this is my weekly plan.

Weekdays (except Wednesdays)
7:45-7:50 Wake up, brush
7:50-8:00 Make Tea, Water Plants
8:00-8:15 Light stretching
8:15-8:30 Get ready
8:30 Leave for work

6:00-7:00 Workout
7:00-7:30 Cooking
7:30-8:00 Cleaning, bath
8:00 Dinner
8:00-11:00 Reading, free time, whatever

Taking the tummy to task

It finally happened. For the first time in my life, I saw a three digit number in the weighing scale. I am officially 100 pounds now. I blame my parents and my in-laws. My in-laws were here for 3 weeks and I started eating 3 meals a day. I guess I put on 2 pounds or so. But at least I was working and doing things around the house. So there was some balance.

And then I went home.

There I ate 3 full meals a day. Then I ate sweets after every meal. And snacks like 5 times in between. And between all the eating I read books and slept or talked non-stop. The most strenuous thing I did was to go shopping. Well, thanks to all that when I came back I was 96. And boy, it didn't take that long to add 4 more pounds. All I know is that at the beginning of December I was 87. In two months I gained 13 pounds and I am not with child.

And apparently not with any sense or self control either.

Now I am not obsessing about a Hollywood figure and I know lot of people who would LOVE to be 100 pounds. But my problem is that out of the 100 lbs, 90 seems to be in the stomach. It is seriously big. I am doing around 100 stomach exercise every day.

Out of my own volition.

It is that bad. What is even worse is that I am tiny everywhere else. So just use your imagination. I wish I was pregnant for more than one reason. Then I could use that as an excuse for the hideousness that is my stomach.

100 things about me

Okay, don't hate me but I did not have too much trouble finding 100 things to write about. I had to actually stop myself at 100. Not because I wanted to obey the rules as such, but because I find it hard to believe anyone will even want to read to 100 let alone more. I have to warn you that there is nothing very interesting in the list.

So here it is.

1. I am a sinner saved by grace
2. I was born in a picturesque coastal town in India- A place where people go for honeymoons
3. I am the youngest of 3 siblings
4. Both my parents had careers up until a few months ago when they finally retired
5. I was always a sick child
6. Yet, I never wished that my mom would stay home and take care of me instead of having a career
7. I am glad I did not as she was very, very successful professionally
8. She is one of two women in India who was awarded her position at that time
9. I grew up with a lot of extended family close to us. So I am close to most of my cousins.
10. I came to US four years ago
11. I still have an accent
12. I stopped being sick after coming here-pretty much
13. English is not my mother tongue
14. But I bet I can beat most of you at word games. (that is arrogance for you!!!)
    
15. Without the luck factor of course
16. As a Christian, I guess I should not use the word luck
17. But I do
18. In my dark moments, I feel I am unlucky
19. But all the time I KNOW I am very blessed
20. Math is my favorite subject in the whole world
21. I invented a method for binary addition when I was in the 10^th grade and shared it with my teacher and friends
22. My teacher was too scared to use as she feared it won’t work in all scenarios
23. It does, but I can’t remember what the method is now.
24. I hate biology
25. The sight of blood makes me faint
26. I am a coward when it comes to needles
27. I was bitten by a dog when I was 10
28. I had to take 6 injections
29. I was scared of dogs since then-until I got Pappu
30. I still miss him
31. I have a BS in Civil Engineering and an MS in Environmental Engineering
32. I know to design a dam and mix concrete
33. I can bake cookies as well
34. They are not mutually exclusive
35. I lived in the same house for 23 years in India
36. After coming here, I lived in 5 houses in 4 years
37. I did not have a car for almost three years I was here
38. I walked 4 miles to and from school during summer
39. Sometimes even in snow during winter
40. Two years of grad school were the hardest years in my life so far
41. Not because I had to walk
42. But it was a time of personal growth
43. The first year my roommates were horrible
44. Second year was better in the beginning and end
45. I have taken one room mate to court (long story)
46. I have always wondered since if I could have done anything different
47. I was always fiercely independent
48. It was my dream to do grad school in US. Big dream for an average middle-class Indian
49. I was also determined not to trench on my parents savings for that
50. By the grace of God, I never had to.
51. I was on a scholarship and worked two jobs to support myself initially
52. My advisor once told me in anger that I was not fit to be in grad school
53. I graduated and published two papers in international journals
54. I have learned not to let someone’s negative opinion become the truth for me
55. I once fell down on ice while running for the bus to take me to school and injured myself bad
56. My MS is literally the result of blood, sweat and tears
57. I want to learn to fly a plane
58. I have done skydiving and bungee jumping
59. I dislike roller coasters
60. I have done white water rafting in icy cold water
61. I don’t wear a watch
62. Or makeup or jewelry
63. Most of the time
64. I taught for two years while at school
65. I love to teach
66. One of my students wrote me a letter of appreciation and baked me cookies
67. It meant the world to me
68. Another student had a crush on me
69. My best friend from school (US) is a guy
70. He is the best friend anyone could ask for
71. We still keep in touch and not just on birthdays
72. I could never get along with boys when I was a kid
73. I guess I was too much like them
74. I love women who think
75. Most of the time I would rather talk about predestination or some such topic that the color of the bedroom curtains.
76. I maintain a list of things I want to do before I die
77. I also maintain a list of my favorite memories so that it doesn’t slip away
78. I trust my husband implicitly
79. I always wanted four children and had their names picked out when I was 11
80. I love to hug
81. I could not imagine marrying someone less smart than me
82. My husband is way smarter than me
83. Even though I might be better at Math
84. I sleep during movies
85. I have no talent to sew/craft etc
86. I have a fear of drowning
87. I was scared of the beach as a kid
88. I was kind of a loner in school
89. Lack of sunshine makes me depressed
90. I want to travel all over the world
91. Hubby and I never went for a honeymoon
92. After nearly two years of marriage the thought still gives me a pang
93. I am pretty bad at sports. The only one I can play is badminton
94. I like my job
95. I love to help people
96. I love the smell of earth after the first rain
97. I read Little Women once every year when I was growing up
98. I finished reading ALL the books in one of my hometown libraries (It was not a big library J)
99. I am not very fond of sweet items-ice cream, chocolates, cakes etc.
100. The thing I wish for most in this life is to become a published writer.

Oh, and I am supposed to tag. I am not naming names, anyone reading this is welcome to do it. After you do, will you please come back and leave me a comment so that I can go and read yours as well?

Pretty please?

A week in my life

While there are at least two posts sitting in drafts, I started on this third one to inflict my hapless reader victims with the incredibly boring details of my life last week.

I had plans to write regularly from last Tuesday to this Tuesday since I knew I might have some spare time on my hands. But our wireless was not working for some reason. And obviously this had to happen when hubs was not around. So I had no internet at home and I did badly want to do my post on the Kevin Swanson girls-going-to-college story. Hopefully that is soon to follow.

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This is the second time I have been by myself in the house. Surprisingly I was not scared. I got on as well as I could without DH around.

Unlike the first time.

That was in May and hubby had to go out of town and I was by myself and I was terrified. I did my breathing and told myself that God is protecting me and not ADT and I managed to calm myself until I watched the 10’o clock news. They were reporting news of a lady (living alone) who had been murdered in her house. The burglar had got in through the open garage door while she was getting groceries from the car.

If I was terrified before, I was on the verge of hysteria then. I checked all doors for the zillionth time before I went upstairs. I prayed and it calmed me some and I went to sleep. Things were different in the morning. I laughed at myself for the scare. After all I had lived by myself in a big city for 7 months.

But for all that I do not watch 10’o clock news any more.

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I have been suffering from insomnia since I came back from Canada. Maybe insomnia is too strong a word. I do not think 1 week is long enough to be classified “chronic”. But I most certainly had difficulty falling asleep. Since hubby was not there, I was happily not cooking anything which required more than 2 minutes. So I did not have much cleaning or washing to do afterwards which freed up my entire evening. So I thought this was the perfect time to cultivate some good habits.

I turned off television by 9:30pm, brushed my teeth, took a shower, prayed and went to sleep at 10pm. Everything went great except that I could not go to sleep. I tossed and turned and just could not get comfortable. Then I somehow would manage to sleep only to get up again in the middle of the night. And that is how it was for the past one week.

Maybe a non-stressful life does not suit me well. Guess I am one of those people who need stress to relax enough to sleep.

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I was in Canada the week before to visit my sis-in-law who had a baby. The baby’s 3 hr day starts at 2am Canada time-so suffice to say my SIL, her husband and my MIL do not get any sleep in the night. So in the few days I was there, I cooked some of my specialties-which included stew and banana bread. Hubby says my banana bread is the last word in banana bread, so we shall talk no more about that.

The stew now-THAT is a different story. As with all recipes, everyone has a different concept for stew. In those days when I was trying out different things everyday, hubby asked me if I would make stew since he loved it and his mom used to make it etc etc. So I called my mom, got the recipe, followed it to the letter and in spite of my best efforts, and 2 hrs of my time, hubby did not like it. The reason? It did not taste like his mom’s. I muttered things not lawful to be uttered. But in any case, I loved it. Lucky for him we were newly married at the time.

I made it in different ways, consulted my MIL, but hubby would not be pleased. So to maintain marital bliss, we agreed not to make it anymore. After a long time, I made it in Canada and everyone loved it. Yesterday MIL made her stew again and told everyone that she liked my stew better than hers. Now I believe compliment in absentia is the best kind because it is sincere. She was not obliged to say it, since I was not there.

So next time I make stew, it is going to be like the original way I made it. It has been proved far more superior.

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In other news, I had multiple vaccinations yesterday as we are applying for residency. I had 3 injections on one arm and I am here to tell the story.

And that my friends, is a miracle worth mentioning on my blog.

I am as a general rule terrified of injections. But this doctor was so funny and kept us laughing, I forgot to be scared. I have only one more vaccination and then I am done.