Christmas (non) cheer

It is the most craziest time of the year. With those holiday greetings and gay, happy meetings when friends come to call. Oh wait, that is not how the song goes?

Well, it should.

Inevitably, this ends up being so crazy busy always. I really have no explanation this year. I don't have a tree up, there is not one shred of decoration up in our house, no one is coming to visit. So it really should be very easy. But it is not. There are a lot of other things going on that is just making it crazy. Seems to me everywhere I turn there is work. Living room, kitchen, laundry room, garage, office work, and then I get into the car to get groceries and the maintenance required light is on in the car. As Anne says in Anne of Green Gables, the stars in their courses is fighting against me. It is a conspiracy. I was just so overwhelmed, I just sat in the car wishing I didn't have to get out. R is crazy busy. His colleague at work is out on paternity leave and so he has his share of the work as well. Poor thing is so unbelievably busy that even with working weekends he is unable to catch up. I was feeling so all over the place with a vague feeling of doom that there are tons of things to be done and that I was dropping balls left and right, I decided I should make list. The list which is growing out of control already has 45 items. And some of the items in the list is driving me crazy, such as finding a d/l cable for the cell phone. Where in the world is that thing? Argh.

I tackled around 3 items and I am already behind on so many things. I feel most days I am just playing catch up and not really making any progress. I mean with the baby, laundry, cooking and keeping the house livable, it is not like I have a lot of "free time." One thing I am glad about is that I am able to spend some time in the morning with God's word and that really helps. I only wish there were more hours in a day.

It is funny that of all the things to feel guilty about, I feel really bad I didn't put up a tree this year. I mean, I feel I am denying Neil something. Why such crazy thoughts? No idea. That is all I need. On top of all the crazy stuff going on, some guilt as well. Oh, and I really dislike this horrible cold spell. I am unable to get out running and when I do go out to the store, the cold gives me a headache.

Yes, I am a spoilt warm weather girl, why do you ask?

I just decided that from tomorrow on, I am going to keep an hourly diary that I will know how I am spending my time daily. Maybe I can catch some times that I find myself not doing anything productive and get back on track that way.

To bed now.